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Fan Fiction by Kati K - Boondock Saints...

The MacManus twins sat at the end of a darkened bar, knocking back their last few pints of Guinness. Money wasn't exactly flowing for a pair of outlaw civil servants of God. Luckily, places like O'Malley's Bar didn't mind sparing a little of what was on tap for the brothers. As they emptied another set of glasses, Shannon the bartender came down to collect them.

"Christ, ye boys look like shite," she laughed.

And it was true. Conner had a few cuts on his face and Murphy had a bruise the size of a small fist on his neck. They glanced at each other, seeming reluctant to talk. Yet, Shannon decided to press on. "Ye must've taken on some real bastards."

"We don't want to talk about it," Conner said flatly.

Murphy nodded slowly. "Yeah, it's too embarrassing."

Shannon opened her mouth to ask, but the twins glared up at her. She closed her mouth with a smile. "Alright boys, but I think I'm gonna cut ye off. Don't want ye two to be picked up by the cops for walkin home in zigzags."

"Ah, can't we stay here, Shannon," Conner begged. "We can take the upstairs room."

"That's my room, fellas," she reminded sternly.

Murphy smiled. "Exactly."

Shannon smiled, but put a hand on her hip and pointed at them. "You boys need to run along before you make me become unlady like."

They started getting off their stools, Conner's hands raised in surrender. "We'll go, we'll go. Though, I'd rather see you become unlady like."

"Plus, we're not boys, Shannon," Murphy added, raising his eyebrows. "We could prove it to ye."

Shannon started to laugh, pointing at the door. "Out with ye, boys."

The twins laughed as they headed for the door, but it died away before they reached it. They stared at the wooden door for a moment.

"You think they've gone, Conner?"

"Only one way to find out, Murph."

They opened the door together, stepping out into the night. The sidewalk was empty which made them sigh in relief. Beginning the journey home, they took the side streets so they wouldn't be seen. When they made the turn down the last alley before their hide-out, they thought they were home free. But a high-pitched squeal erupted and they knew they'd been caught.

"Oh my God, it's the Boondock Saints!"

Turning around slowly, they saw a huge gang of teenagers coming for them.

"Oh, f*** me, Murphy."

"I'm sure they'll do it for us Conner."

Without turning back around, they knew they'd been surrounded. For the second time that night, they felt eager hands grabbing for them from every side as all the girls cried out in glee. Before they completely buried in bodies to the point of suffocation, they both mumbled grudgingly, "F***in' fan girls."

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Ah! Gotta love the Boondock Saints… I hope everyone realizes I don't own them. Oh, and sorry if I offended any die-hard fan girls who are deluded enough to think they have a chance with movie characters. Fantasizing is good enough for me… thinks steamy thoughts about the MacManus Twins sigh…